By Asma bint Shameem
Mistake # 1:Thinking
that their Ihraam is the 'cap' they wear over their head:
Some of my sisters get
confused about what 'Ihraam' means and they think the word 'Ihraam' refers to
the CAP that they put on over their hair.And they don't take this cap off, no
matter what, thinking they will "break their Ihraam".
My dear sisters, Ihraam
is not a set of “clothes” that you put on.
And Ihraam is definitely
not the cap you put on over your head.
Rather it's a state that
you enter into, with certain restrictions that come into play once you enter
the state of Ihraam.
Also, putting on any
item of clothing after you enter into the state of Ihraam does not mean that
you cannot take it off later.
And taking it off does
NOT mean that you ended your Ihraam.
That's why the Ulama say
we can change our Ihraam (meaning our clothes), and even wash it if it gets
dirty.
The scholars of the
Standing Committee said:
"It is permissible
for the pilgrim in ihraam for Hajj or 'Umrah to change his ihraam clothes and
put on another set of ihraam clothes, and that does not affect his ihraam for
Hajj or 'Umrah." (Standing Committee for Academic Research and Issuing
Fatwas, Fataawa al-Lajnah, 11/185)
Mistake #2. Excessive
fear of breaking their hair.
Some sisters have
excessive fear of breaking their hair. They are literally mortified if they see
even one single hair on their clothes, pillow etc.
This fear of their hair
breaking is so bad that they don't want to take off their scarf/dupatta/hijaab,
even when they're by themselves or among just women.
That's because they
think they will have to pay penalty for their hair breaking or that they will
be sinful or that it might break their ihraam. They are so worried about their
hair breaking, that they don't even take off their hijaab or headpiece for
making wudhu
Dear sisters, first of
all, realize that this is a trick of the Shaytaan.
Think about it…
If you don't do wudhu
properly, would your prayer be valid? Would your tawaaf be valid?
Secondly, do you really
think Allaah would hold you accountable if you did something that was not in
your control?
No of course not.
He is The Most
Merciful.
He is the Most
Forgiving.
Then, why would He would
nullify your ihraam just because a few hair fell out on their own, something
that was out of your control?!
Yes, we are not supposed
to cut our hair while in the state of ihraam, but the prohibition is for the
hair to be cut, plucked, shaved, etc. ON PURPOSE. Not INvoluntarily.
Mistake # 3: Thinking
Nothing can touch your face.
Some sisters have this
wrong notion that it is not allowed for anything to touch their face while in
ihraam.
So they don't wipe their
faces with a towel, after doing wudhu and they don't let anything else touch
their faces, either.
And some of my niqaabi
sisters put a cap on heir head and then drape a piece of cloth over the cap in
such a way that the cloth does not touch their face.
This has no basis in
Islaam.
Remember, there is
nothing wrong with anything touching the face of the woman in ihraam.
Shaikh Ibn Baaz
said:
"Many women wear a
headband under the veil to keep it away from the face. This action has no
basis." (Fataawa bin Baaz)
Some sisters might be
doing this action, based on the hadeeth of the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa
sallam) when he said:
"Women should not
wear niqaab or gloves." (al-Bukhaari)
Although this hadeeth is
authentic, it does NOT mean that nothing can touch the face. It only means that
the women should not wear 'niqab' (or veil) itself, the way it is stitched to
be worn over the face. That's all.
In fact, the niqaabi
sisters
should definitely try
and cover their faces with something else other than the niqaab, when they fear
that there will be men around. And when the men are gone, they can uncover
their faces.
This is how our Mother Aaishah
Radhi Allaahu anha covered herself when she was in ihraam.
She said: "The
riders used to pass by us when we were with the Messenger of Allaah (Sal
Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) in ihraam. When they came alongside us we would
lower our jilbaabs from our heads over our faces, and when they had passed by
we would uncover them." ( Abu Dawood--saheeh by al-Albaani)
Shaikh Ibn 'Uthaymeen
said:
"It is not narrated
that the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) forbade the woman in ihraam to
cover her face; rather he forbade the niqaab only because it is worn on the
face.
He differentiated
between the niqaab and covering the face. Based on this, if a woman in ihraam
covers her face, we say there is nothing wrong with that, but it is better for
her to uncover it so long as there are no non-mahram men around her, in which
case she should cover her face from them." (Al-Sharh al-Mumti',
7/153)
Mistake # 4: Getting
their hair cut ONLY by someone who has exited ihram
This is also a very
common misconception.
The sisters think
that ONLY the one who is NOT in ihraam, can cut their hair, once they've
finished with their rituals.
And they refuse to cut
their own hair to exit ihraam nor do they allow another sister who has not yet
exited ihraam to cut it for them, thinking that she is not allowed to do that
for them.
This is a WRONG
notion.
Actually, if you think
about it, you are supposed to cut your hair when you finish with all the
rituals.
The way to get out of
ihraam IS to cut your hair once you're done with your Sa'i, right?
So you're not doing
anything wrong if you cut your own hair, or ask some other sister, who is still
in ihraam, to cut it for you.
The Prophet (Sal Allaahu
Alaiyhi wa sallam) commanded his companions, duringthe Farewell Pilgrimage:
"LET HIM CUT
(meaning, HIS OWN) hair then exit ihraam." (al-Bukhaari, Muslim)
Shaykh Ibn 'Uthaymeen
said:
"He may shave his
own head, or he may ask someone else to do it, which is different from the view
of some scholars who said that if he shaves his own head he is doing something
that he should not do. We say that he is not doing something that he should not
do, rather he is shaving his head as part of the ritual."
(al-Sharh al-Mumti'
(7/328).
And the Shaikh was
asked:
If a woman cuts her own
hair, does she owe any penalty?
He replied:
"No. If
a woman cuts her own hair, or a man shaves his own head, or he has it shaved by
someone who is in ihraam, or by someone who is not in ihraam, all of that is
permissible." (Liqa' al-Baab il-Maftooh (224/42).
Mistake # 4: Not
going to the Jamaraat or Muzdalifah
Some of my sisters
delegate someone else to go throw the pebbles on their behalf for no valid
reason.
They just get scared of
the crowd or sometimes, they get plain old lazy, not understanding the
importance of doing it themselves, even if they are able.
I say to my sisters;
Masha Allaah, Allaah has blessed us with health. Alhamdulillaah, we are young,
energetic, confident, and capable.
We are able to do
anything and everything when we are back home and yet, when it comes to Hajj
and the Jamaraat, all of a sudden we become "frail, little, weak 'women'
who cannot go throw the pebbles".
Don't be lazy about the
rituals of Hajj.
Realize the significance
of doing everything yourself if you have the ability.
KNOW that even throwing
the pebbles is an act of ibaadah!
So there's no need to be
scared at all.
Yes, many years ago, we
heard horror stories of stampedes, and people suffocating or hurting
themselves.
But now, no more.
Alhamdulillaah, the Saudi government has renovated the whole Jamaraat complex a
few years ago and it is the easiest thing inthe world. I have seen old
people in wheelchairs, people on crutches, and kids as little as 3 and 4
years old, throwing the pebbles themselves.
So don't get scared and
do it yourself. Think of all the reward you will get and all the sins that will
be forgiven for you.
Yes, indeed, if there is
a lot of crowd or your safety is an issue, we as women, are allowed to go later
than the rest of the crowd and we can delay the stoning until the evening or
the night.
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen
said:
"It is permissible
to delay their (meaning women) stoning of the Jamrah until the crowding is less
or has stopped, and there is nothing wrong with them doing that." (Fatawa
shaikh Ibn Uthaymeen)
Similarly, for staying
in Muzdalifah, it is better for you, if you are able, to stay the whole night
in Muzdalfah.
Yes, it is allowed for
women to leave after half the night has passed, if there is an excuse such as
sickness, weakness, or just because we are women.
BUT, it is better if you
do stay the whole night following the Sunnah of the Prophet (Sal Allaahu
Alaiyhi wa sallam).
So don't chicken out.
Mistake # 5: Crowding
with the men
In trying to touch the
Black Stone, I've seen some of my sisters, being pushed and shoved
(unintentionally) by men all around, totally squished in between them, their
hijaab half way or even totally off of their heads, sweating profusely, red in
the face and having difficulty breathing, some getting hurt, falling or even
collapsing because of the pressure of the crowds.
Trying to get in that
Hajj crowd to kiss the Black Stone is next to impossible for a woman without
experiencing all of the above.
Think about it sisters.
Touching the Black Stone is a beautiful Sunnah. But it is a “Sunnah”.
And protecting yourself
and your hayaa from coming in contact with all the strange men is a
“FARDH”.
So beware, my sisters,
of crowding with men inall the rituals of Hajj, especially during tawaaf and at
the Black Stone, during Sa'i and when stoning the Jamaraat. Choose times when
there is less crowding.
Umm al-Mu'mineen Aaishah
used to do tawaaf in an area away from the men, and she did not touch the Black
Stone or the Yemeni Corner if there was crowding.
"Aaishah Radhi
Allaahu anhaa used to do tawaaf far away from the men, not mixing with
them."
A woman said: "O
Mother of the Believers, let us go and touch the Black Stone!"
She said: "Go
yourself," and she refused to go."
In my opinion, the best
place for us women to do tawaaf is up on the roof of the Masjid.
Now it may seem like a
big distance from far, but I promise you, all it takes is an hour and 10
minutes, total, to be precise, to complete the seven rounds of a tawaaf,
walking at an average pace.
An hour and ten
minutes!!!
The Shaytaan may play
with your mind and make it seem like a lot. But then ask yourself this...don't
you easily, easily, walk an hour ten minutes in the mall? Well then.....?
And you know what?
It takes the same amount
of time to do tawaaf downstairs as well!
How's that..you ask?
Because of the large
amount of people, you are moving at a much slower pace downstairs
(actually, barely moving) and it just takes longer because of that.
As compared to that,
it's much easier and sooo much better on the roof; you are moving at a faster
pace, it is cooler up there and you can make a lot of dua and have much more
khushoo' and concentration in your dua because you will not be worried
about bumping into or coming in contact with other strange men.
Mistake # 6: Rushing
through Ibaadah.
Some sisters rush
through their Ibaadaat, whether it is their Salah, dua, Tawaaf or any other
Ibaadah, wanting to do it quickly, focusing on the quantity of their Ibaadah
rather than the quality.
Remember, dear sisters,
that Allaah will look at the quality of your worship, NOT your quantity.
And that's why our deeds will be weighed on the Day of Judgment and not
counted. If you do pray two rakah with khushoo', concentrating on what you are
saying, beseeching Allaah with humility, wouldn't that be better and more
acceptable to Allaah than even 50 or even a 100 rakah quickly pecking the
ground, without knowing a word of what you are saying?
Every time you do any
Ibaadah, check to see whether you have khushoo or not? Are you focused in what
you are doing? Do you know the meaning of what you are saying or asking? Are
you moving at a slow, measured pace or are you rushing through it?
Remember what the
Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) said:
"The worst type of
thief is the one who steals from his prayer!" The Companions asked,
"Oh Messenger of Allah! How does one steal from his prayers?" The
Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) responded, "He does not complete
his bowing, nor his prostrations." Or he said "He does not straighten
his backbone while bowing and prostrating." (Ahmed, al-Tabarani, others:
saheeh by al-Albaani)
And that's also why one
Tawaaf upstairs with Khushoo' is better than 3 downstairs in which there is no
khushoo'. Remember it's about quality, NOT quantity
Mistake # 7: Misbehaving
in the Masjid of the Prophet Sal Allaau Alayhi wa sallam
One of the worst
mistakes that I see the sisters making is at the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi
wa sallam)'s Masjid.
When the doors are
opened in the morning and evening, for the sisters so that they can visit
the Raudah of the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam), they totally lose
all sense of who they are, where they are and what they are doing. They run
like a wild animal let loose, shouting and screaming in ignorance, pushing each
other, trampling anyone and everyone that comes in their way, be it a small
child or an old woman, their mother's age!
Subhaan Allaah sisters!
Is this what the Prophet
(Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) taught us?! Is this the way you behave in a
Masjid, let alone the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam)'s Masjid?!
Is this the respect he
(Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) deserves from you?!
Remember when visiting
the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam)'s Masjid, to behave with honor and
dignity, with the hayaa' that Allaah has adorned you with, as a believing
Muslim woman would. Remember to keep your voice soft and your walk paced. Don't
shove, push, harm or hurt your fellow Muslim sisters. Even if you didn't get a
chance to pray in that area, if you let your sister pray there for the sake of
Allaah just because she is your Muslim sister, Allaah will reward you, and He
knows best, perhaps even more than He would have, had you yourself had a
chance to pray there!
Mistake # 8: Wasting
precious time in Mina
I see SO many sisters
wasting their time talking with each other, about nothing specific, mingling
and socializing with the other Hajjis, while they are staying in Mina and even
on the day of Arafah, which is the most important day of Hajj!
They forget that these
are the most blessed days in which Ibaadah is dearest to Allaah. They forget
that Mina is not a place to socialize; rather it is a place foribaadah and dhikr
and istighfaar and dua. They forget that Day of Arafah is THE DAY for Hajj.
That's what this whole journey is all about. Instead of remembering Allaah,
they busy themselves with idle talk, laughing, joking, even gheebah and gossip.
Now, there's nothing wrong
with talking for a little bit and to enquire about each other's well being,
etc. In fact, it becomes an act of Ibaadah if you talk with that niyyah of
being kind and polite to your fellow Muslim or for taking a little rest
inbetween your ibadah to refresh yourself.
But when this talking
takes over one's time and this is what a person is doing the majority of the
time in Mina, then it becomes an a serious issue of wasting precious time. And
in the end, no one loses but you.
Sisters, don't you want
to utilize this beautiful blessed time to make dua and maximize your chance of
acceptance with Allaah? Don't you want to spend these blessed days in the dhikr
of Allaah and asking Him to forgive you? After all, this is a chance that may
never come back. You can always talk later, but these days inMina once gone
will be gone.
So remember this and
don't get pulled in when others are doing it and remind them gently. It will be
written as good deeds for you, bi idhnillaah.
May Allaah enable us to
perform Hajj according to the Sunnah of the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa
sallam), in a manner that is most pleasing to Him. May Allaah accept this Hajj
and make it Mabroor for all of us. Ameen.
And Allaah knows best.
