680. Is It Permissible To Give Charity To Non Muslims?

By Asma Bint Shameem

It is permissible to give non-Muslims from your “voluntary” charity if you like. 

Shaikh Ibn Uthaymeen said: 

“Yes, it is permissible to give charity to non-Muslims in order to soften their hearts towards Islaam, with the hope that they will become Muslim, whether it is zakaah or voluntary charity. 

With regard to other purposes, it is permissible to give them voluntary charity but it is not permissible to give them zakaah, because Allaah says:

“Allaah does not forbid you to deal justly and kindly with those who fought not against you on account of religion nor drove you out of your homes. Verily, Allaah loves those who deal with equity” [al-Mumtahanah 60:8]”

(al-Ijaabaat alaa as’alatul jaaliyaat 1/24,25)

So although it is permissible to give *sadaqah* to anyone even non Muslims, I would recommend giving it to some poor *Muslims* instead. 

That’s because there are plenty of  resources for the non Muslims like their churches and other non Muslims. 

But for the poor Muslims, there’s no one but us to help them. 

Besides, the Muslims have more Haqq on our money because of the bonds of Islaamic brotherhood. 

And Allaah knows best

679. You Cannot Throw The Word Divorce

 By Ama Bint Shameem

You cannot throw around the word “divorce”. 

You must take it seriously. 

It is so serious that words of divorce count even if a person is joking about it. 

The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said: 

“There are three matters in which seriousness is serious and joking is serious: marriage, divorce and taking back (one’s wife).” (Abu Daawood 2194, at-Tirmidhi 1184, and Ibn Maajah 2039; hasan by al-Albaani in Irwaa’ al-Ghaleel 1826).

Ibn Taymiyah said: 

“With regard to a divorce issued in jest, it counts as such according to the majority of scholars. Similarly, a nikaah (marriage contract) done in jest is also valid, on the basis of a marfoo‘ hadeeth. 

This is what is narrated from the Sahaabah and Taabi‘een, and it is the view of the majority.”

(al-Fataawa al-Fiqhiyyah al-Kubra 6/63)

But sometimes a person does not know the ruling and is *ignorant* of the seriousness of it. 

Or the person may be saying the words to scare or threaten the wife or using the words in ambiguous way etc. 

So though this should not be condoned in any way, but the intention must be looked at and each case should be considered individually. 

2. And yes it’s true that any woman who wants to get married must have a wali, according to the *majority* of the scholars. 

And that’s the *correct* opinion. 

The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam  said: 

“There is no marriage without a guardian (wali).” (at-Tirmidhi saheeh by al-Albaani) 

And he Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said:

“There is no marriage except with a wali and two witnesses of good character.” (al-Bayhaqi- saheeh by al-Albaani)

However if someone did not know that or they married following the opinion of a scholar that allows for a woman to marry without a wali, believing that this is valid, then we cannot say that they are committing zina or that their children are illegitimate. 

According to the Hanafi scholars, the presence of a wali is not a condition for the validity of the marriage as long as there are at least two witnesses and the marriage is announced. 

If two witnesses are not present, then the marriage is not valid according to them.

Although this view is not the correct opinion, and people need to be educated about it, any marriage done without a wali is considered valid according to the Hanafis. And to say that each and every one of their marriages are invalid is a big statement.

The scholars said:

“Given that there is a difference of opinion among the leading scholars regarding this matter, and that it is an issue that is subject to ijtihaad, if a Muslim lives in a country which follows the Hanafi madhhab and regards a marriage contract done without a guardian as valid, and the marriage contract was done on that basis, then it may be deemed to be valid in that case, and the ruling of the court is not to be annulled.”

(Islamqa Fatwa 381188)

Ibn Qudaamah said:

“If a judge rules that this marriage contract is valid, or the one who did the marriage contract is a judge, it is not permissible to annul it. 

The same applies to all marriages that are done in an inappropriate way.”

(al-Mughni 9/347)

And Allaah knows best.

678. Treat Your Children Fairly In The Matter Of Inheritance

By Asma Bint Shameem

What your brothers are doing is wrong and unjust. 

It’s not up to me or you to write a will however we want during our lifetime and divide our money among whoever we like, like the non Muslims do. 

Rather, Inheritance can only be divided after the *death* of a person. 

Secondly, the shares of this inheritance are also not up to the discretion of the person. 

Rather, the inheritance must only be divided according to the rules clearly outlined in the Qur’aan by Allaah Himself. 

The money automatically goes to whoever the surviving rightful heirs are after the death of the person. 

And no one needs to “write a will” for that. 

2. If a person wants to divide his property and it’s in his final sickness, and the person is about to die, then that’s allowed. 

And in this situation, this would be called a “bequest”. 

And one can only bequeath up to *one third* of their estate to someone. 

However a person can NOT  bequeath anything to *his shar’ee heir*  because  the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam forbade that. 

He Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said:

“Allaah has given each person who has rights his rights, and there is no bequest to an heir.”

(Abu Dawood; saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood)

3. It is permissible to divide some property or wealth among the heirs during the lifetime of a person, when he’s in GOOD HEALTH. 

This would be considered a “gift” and can NOT be called “inheritance”. 

A person can “gift” his children or spouse some property or money during his lifetime, as long as he is FAIR in his division. 

And his intention is not to *‘deprive’* a rightful heir. 

This gift has to be JUST and given to ALL his children equally according to the majority of the scholars. 

He cannot give to one of his children and exclude the others,

UNLESS the children don’t mind and WILLFULLY agree with that, without any pressure or compulsion. 

Anyone who divides unfairly, against his children’s will is sinful in the sight of Allaah. 

And he has to answer to Allaah for his unfairness. 

al-Nu’maan radhi Allaahu anhu said that his father brought him to the Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam 

and said, 

“I have given this son of mine a slave.” 

He said, 

“Have you given a similar gift to all of your sons?” 

He said, 

“No.” 

He said, 

“Then take it back.” (al-Bukhaari, Muslim)

According to another version he said: 

“Fear Allaah and treat your children fairly.” So he went back and took back his gift.” (al-Bukhaari)

Imaams Abu Haneefah, Maalik, ash-Shaafa‘i and Ibn al-Mubaarak said: 

“The female is to be given the same as the male, because the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said to Basheer ibn Sa‘d: 

“Treat them fairly (equally)” and he explained that by saying: “Would you like them all to honor you equally?” 

He said: 

“Yes.” 

He said: 

“Then treat them fairly (equally).” 

And the daughter is like the son in terms of the duty to honor the parents, and the same applies to giving gifts to her. 

It was narrated that Ibn ‘Abbaas said: The Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said: 

“Treat your children fairly (equally) in giving gifts; and if I were to have given precedence to anyone, I would have given precedence to women over men.” Narrated by Sa‘eed in his Sunan. 

And because it is a gift given during one’s lifetime, so male and female are to be treated equally, as is the case with regard to spending on maintenance and clothing.”

But if someone gives one or some of his children and excludes his other children with the WILLFUL CONSENT of the others and they’re not under any pressure etc then it’s allowed to do so and the person is not sinful. 

Shaykh Ibn Baaz said:  

“The father (mother) must be just and fair to his children, males and females. It is not permissible for him to give gifts to some of them and not to others, EXCEPT with the consent of those who are not given, if they are mature. Their consent should not be given out of fear of their father, rather it should be given willingly, with no threats or fear of their father. Not differentiating between them is better in all cases, and is better for their hearts, because the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said: “Fear Allaah and treat your children justly.” Saheeh – agreed upon.”

(Majmoo’ Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn Baaz, 9/452)

The scholars said:

“During a person’s lifetime his wealth cannot be described as an inheritance, and those who will be given a share of it cannot be called heirs, because the first condition of inheritance is the death of the testator. 

There are two issues that are worth pointing out here: 

1.If your father wants to give his children – only – something whilst he is still alive, that is described as a gift or present, and it is permissible for the father to do that, but that is on condition that he treat all his children fairly, both male and female.

2.If your father wants to divide his property among all his heirs, it is permissible for him to do that on condition that he does not deprive some of them and he does not detract from their rights. 

However we do not encourage anyone to do that, because of what it may cause of some of the children being tempted by that wealth into falling short in honoring their father. 

Moreover, he himself may need that wealth after it is no longer his. 

He may have more children, other than those to whom he gave that wealth, in which case those new children would be deprived of having a share of their father’s wealth with their siblings.

It should be noted that if handover of a gift to children is deferred until after one dies, then it becomes a bequest, and it is proven in the hadith that “There is no bequest to an heir.” Such a gift should be put back with the estate and shared out according to the laws prescribed in Islam.” (Islamqa Fatwa # 192033)

And Allaah knows best

677. Do We Need To Read The Surah In The Same Order As They Appear In The Quran

 By Asma bint Shameem 

The basic principle is to read the surahs in the salaah in the same order as they appear in the Qur’aan. 

Although it’s BETTER and *preferred* to keep the order of the Surahs when reciting them in prayers, it’s *not mandatory.* 

Rather it’s *permissible* to go out of order and the prayer is valid. 

Proof:

Hudhayfah radhi Allaahu anhu said: 

“I prayed with the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam 

one night, and he started to recite al-Baqarah. I thought, he will do rukoo when he reaches one hundred aayaat, but he kept going. 

I thought, he will complete it in one rakah, but he kept going. I thought, he will do rukoo now, but he started to recite al-Nisaa, and he recited all of it, then he started to recite Aal Imraan and recited all of it.”

(Muslim 772)

This shows that the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam did not read the suwar in order. 

Rather he read Baqarah then Nisaa then Aal-Imraan although Aal Imraan comes *before* Nisaa. 

So it’s allowed to go out of order although it’s preferable to keep the order as it. 

And Allaah knows best

676. What Should The Terminally Ill Person Do ? And What Can OTHERS Do For Him?

By Asma bint Shameem 

Everyone’s lifespan is written. 

And we’re only here on this earth for an appointed time. 

When the time is up, we leave. 

No one knows exactly WHEN that time is. 

But sometimes, out of His Mercy, Allaah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala reminds a person of that time of departure by afflicting His slave with a terminal illness. 

Although it is hard to accept, this is actually a BLESSING IN  DISGUISE, because this way the person can “PREPARE” for that inevitable meeting with his Rabb and “get ready” for that ultimate journey. 

Here are some of the things a terminally ill person can do. 

1. He should make sincere Taubah to Allaah for all his previous major and minor sins. 

2. He should ask others for forgiveness 

3. He himself should clear his heart and forgive those that might have hurt him or treated him unfairly in any way. 

4. He should strengthen his ties with his blood relatives and ‘fix’ any that needed fixing. 

5. He should pay off his debts and settle any other financial issues with others. 

6. If he has any money he should write his will, if he wants to donate one third of that to charity. 

7. He should have good and positive thoughts about Allaah and hope to have a good end.  

8. He should try and live whatever life is left for him in the obedience to Allaah and stay away from all disobedience 

9. He must be very vigilant about his five daily prayers. 

10. He should busy himself with dhikr, read the Qur’aan with meanings, pray Nawaafil if he has the energy, do a lot of sadaqah regularly even if it’s a small amount and other good deeds. 

10. Stay away from people and places that are “dunya- oriented” and are a distraction to the goal of the Aakhirah. 

 *In the LAST FEW DAYS*

When he’s in the last hours/days of his sickness:

1. People around the dying person should say good things and make duaa for him 

The Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said:

“When you visit a sick or a dying person, you should utter good words because the angels say “Ameen” at what you are saying.” (Muslim)

2. They should encourage him to say "Laa Ilaaha Illa Allaah”

The Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said:

“Exhort your dying people to recite: Laa ilaaha illallaah.” (Muslim)

That’s because if their last words are “Laa ilaaha illallaah”, they will enter Jannah with the Will and Permission of Allaah. 

The Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said: 

“He whose last words are: Laa ilaaha illallaah shall enter Jannah.” (Abu Dawood- saheeh by al-Albaani)

And he said: 

“He who dies while knowing (fully well) that there is none worthy of worship (in truth) but Allaah shall enter Jannah.” (Muslim)

3. The dying person should ask Allaah for forgiveness and mercy. 

The last words of the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam were:

“Allahumma-ghfir li, warhamni, wa alhiqni bir Rafiqil-Aa’laa”

 “O Allaah, forgive me, bestow Your Mercy on me and let me join the exalted companions.” (al-Bukhaari, Muslim) 

4. He should think positive and have good hopes with Allaah.  

The Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said:

“None of you should approach death but he is hoping good from Allaah.” (Muslim)

5. The people around him should remind him of his good deeds 

Ibrahim An-Nakha’i said: 

“People liked to remind righteous people of their righteous actions so that they would have good thinking of Allaah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala.” (Ibn Abu Ad-Dunya)

*IMPORTANT NOTE*:

*1. No Qur’aan or Yaseen*

There’s NO PROOF of reading the Qur’aan for the dying person or reading Surah Yaseen etc. 

The hadeeth about reading Surah Yaseen is weak. 

And a weak hadeeth means that it’s highly doubtful that the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam ever said that or did that or approved of that. 

2. No other bid’ah 

Nothing should be done for the dying person that has no proof from the Qur’aan and/or authentic Sunnah such as slaughtering at the bedside, sprinkling blood of the sacrifice on him, going around the patient seven times with certain things like chillies, and many other practices that are borrowed from the Hindus and others. 

Astaghfirullaah!

Imagine the SIN of sending someone off to their Creator with Shirk and bid’ah!

La Hawla wa la Quwwata illa billaah. 

May Allaah guide us. 

May Allaah give us a good end.

May our last words be “Laa ilaaha illallaah” 

And May Allaah be pleased with us when we meet Him. Ameen

675. Can I Keep Dog As A Pet?

By Asma bint Shameem 

It's not allowed for Muslims to keep dogs as pets except for guarding, hunting or other specific purposes. 

The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said:

"Whoever keeps a dog, his good deeds will decrease every day by one qeeraat (meaning a very large portion), unless it is a dog for herding sheep, farming or hunting." (al-Bukhaari 2322)

In another hadeeth he Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said:

“Whoever keeps a dog, except a dog for herding livestock or a dog that is trained for hunting, TWO qiraats will be deducted from his reward each day.” (al-Bukhaari 5059, Muslim 2941)

And he Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam also said:

“The angels do not enter a house in which there is a dog or an image.” (Ibn Maajah -- saheeh by al-Albaani)

Shaykh Ibn Uthaymeen said: 

“With regard to keeping dogs, this is haraam and is in fact a major sin, because the one who keeps a dog, except those for which an exception has been made, will have two qiraats deducted from his reward every day.” (Sharh Riyaadh al-Saaliheen, 4/241)

*What if a dog touches me*?

If we pet a dog or the dog sniffs or  touches us, it’s not necessarily a problem. 

That’s because the dog itself is not considered naajis .

It’s the dog’s saliva. 

So as long as the dog’s saliva doesn't get in contact with you, it wouldn’t necessarily be impure. 

The saliva of the dog is what's considered najis,  so if the dog LICKS you or your clothes etc or somehow his saliva gets on you then you have to wash that part seven times, one time of which you have to wash with dust. 

The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said:

“If a dog licks the vessel of any one of you, let him wash it seven times, one of which should be with earth.” (al-Bukhaari, Muslim)

The word 'vessel' is mentioned here but the ulama say that it's just an example and they draw their analogy with this word. 

Sheikh Sulaymaan al-Isaa, professor at al-Imaam University in Riyadh said:

“A Muslim should not play with dogs. 

The saliva of a dog is impure (najas). 

The way to remove this impurity is to wash the affected are seven times, one time with dirt. 

It does not matter whether the contaminated area is a dish, an article of clothing, or the skin. 

A person who comes in contact with the saliva of a dog must purify the affected area correctly in order for him to be able to perform prayers.”

*How do we wash clothes with dust*?

Just like we 'wash' our hands and faces with dust while doing Tayammum. :)

In case dust is not available then we can use soap or some other alternative. 

And Allaah knows best

674. Women Are Strictly Prohibited To Wear Perfume

 By Asma bint Shameem 

SISTERS PLEASE PAY ATTENTION!*

Alhamdulillaah it’s Friday and you're going to the masjid for Jumu’ah prayers. 

That’s fine. 

But just make sure not to wear any perfume. 

Why is that, you ask?

Because when women go out, they’re strictly prohibited to wear perfume. 

The Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said:

“If any one of you (women) goes out to the masjid, let her not *touch any perfume*.” (Muslim)

*So what’s wrong with it?*

*1. Allaah will not accept her prayer*!*

One time a woman passed by Abu Hurayrah radhi Allaahu anhu and her scent was overpowering. 

He said, 

“O female servant of the Almighty, are you going to the masjid?” 

She said, 

“Yes,” 

He said, 

“And have you put on perfume because of that?” 

She said, 

“Yes.” 

He said, 

“ *Go back and wash yourself*, for I heard the Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam say: 

‘ *If a woman comes out to the masjid and her fragrance is overpowering*, *Allaah will not accept any prayer from her until she goes home and washes herself*.’” (Abu Dawood, Ibn Maajah- Hasan by al-Albaani)

Just imagine! 

The Sahaabah would send the women BACK and not let them attend the prayer if they were wearing perfume!

 *She’s called an adulteress *!

The Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said: 

“ *Any woman who puts on perfume then passes by people so that they can smell her fragrance, is an adulteress*.” 

(Ahmad and al-Nasaa’i — hasan by al-Albaani)

An *adulteress*?! 

Yaa Allaah! Astaghfirullaah!

*It’s not just the Jumu’ah prayer* 

The Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said: 

“ *Any woman who has scented herself with bakhoor (incense), let her not attend ‘Ishaa’ prayers with us*.” (Muslim)

*Why is it prohibited*?

Women shouldn’t wear perfume and go to the masjid or any public place where there’s exposure to 

non-mahram men because it’s a very strong form of attraction and goes against the conditions of hijaab. 

*BUT* if the fragrance is very light and no one can really smell you, or you’re amongst women only or there aren't any non-mahrams around, then there’s nothing wrong with wearing perfume. 

And of course if you’re at home with your husband, do use perfume as much as you like!

*But I will smell bad!*

You will NOT smell bad if you 

-take a shower before you go 

-make sure your underarms are shaved and clean 

-use deodorant 

-wear freshly washed clothes and abaayah

If you do all of the above, there will be absolutely NO bad smell! Guaranteed!

*So all you sisters out there!*

Go to the masjid for Salaah by all means. and may Allaah accept from you. 

Just be careful to stay away from using any kind of perfume or fragrance. 

And Allaah knows best

673. It’s Not Allowed For A Woman To Wear Niqaab Or Gloves While In The State Of Ihraam

By Asma Bint Shameem

 It’s not allowed for a woman to wear niqaab or gloves while in the state of ihraam. 

A man stood up and said: “O Messenger of Allaah, what clothes do you command us to wear in ihraam?” 

The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alayhi wa Sallam said: 

“Do not wear shirts, pants or any kind of headgear… and women in ihraam should not wear niqaab or gloves.”

(al-Bukhaari, 1741)

However that does not mean that women who wear niqaab should go around exposing their faces and hands to non mahram men. 

Rather we should use anything else to cover the face.  

The Sahaabiyaat would lower their head scarf and cover their faces from the non mahrams. 

Our Mother Aaishah Radhi Allaahu anhaa said:

“The riders would pass by us when we were in ihraam with the Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alayhi wa Sallam.

When they came in line with us, one of us would lower her jilbab from the top of her head over her face, then when they had passed us, we would uncover our faces.”

(Abu Dawood 1833; saheeh by al-Albaani in Risaalat Jilbaab al-Mar’ah)

If someone does anything that’s prohibited while in Ihraam, there are three possible scenarios. 

- they didn’t know the ruling or forgot about it or they were forced to do it. 

Then there’s no sin and nothing needs to be done. 

-they knew the ruling but had a valid reason to do it. 

Here they have to offer the expiation but there’s no sin on them. 

-they knew about the ruling but did it even though there was no valid reason. 

In this situation they should offer expiation and they are sinful. 

But the umrah/hajj is valid. 

The expiation is either fasting for three days, or feeding six poor persons among the poor of the Haram, or slaughtering a sheep in the Haram.

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen explains this in detail.

He said:

“If a person in ihraam does any of the things that are forbidden, such as having intercourse, killing game, etc, then one of the following three scenarios must apply: 

1. He *forgot or was unaware of the ruling*, or he was *forced* or he was *asleep*. 

In that case he does not have to do anything. 

There is no sin on him and he does not have to offer the expiation, and his pilgrimage is still valid, because Allaah says:

“Our Lord! Punish us not if we forget or fall into error, our Lord! Lay not on us a burden like that which You did lay on those before us (Jews and Christians); our Lord! Put not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear. Pardon us and grant us forgiveness. Have mercy on us. You are our Mawlaa (Patron, Supporter and Protector) and give us victory over the disbelieving people”

[al-Baqarah 2:286] 

And Allaah says:

“And there is no sin on you concerning that in which you made a mistake, except in regard to what your hearts deliberately intend. And Allaah is Ever Oft‑Forgiving, Most Merciful”

[al-Ahzaab 33:5]

2 . He did the forbidden action *deliberately* but for a *valid reason* that makes it permissible. 

In that case he has to do what is required in the event of committing a forbidden action (i.e., offer the expiation) but there is no sin on him, because Allaah says:

“And perform properly (i.e. all the ceremonies according to the ways of Prophet Muhammad), the Hajj and ‘Umrah (i.e. the pilgrimage to Makkah) for Allaah. But if you are prevented (from completing them), sacrifice a Hady (animal, i.e. a sheep, a cow, or a camel) such as you can afford, and do not shave your heads until the Hady reaches the place of sacrifice. And whosoever of you is ill or has an ailment in his scalp (necessitating shaving), he must pay a Fidyah (ransom) of either observing Sawm (fasts) (three days) or giving Sadaqah (charity — feeding six poor persons) or offering sacrifice (one sheep)”

[al-Baqarah 2:196].

3 .He did the forbidden action *deliberately but with no valid reason* that makes it permissible. 

In this case he has to do what is required in the event of committing a forbidden action (i.e., offer the expiation) and there is sin on him. 

(Manaasik al-Hajj wa’l-‘Umrah, Ch. 5, Mahdhooraat al-Ihraam).

And Allaah knows best.

672. Refrain From Lying

 By Asma Bint Shameem

Lying is a major sin yet people take it so lightly. 

The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said:

“Refrain from lying. For lying leads to wickedness, and wickedness leads to the Fire. 

A person will keep telling lies and trying hard to lie, until he is *recorded with Allaah as a liar.*" (al-Bukhaari, Muslim) 

Astaghfirullaah imagine being known to Allaah as a liar!

Lying is a sign of hypocrisy. 

The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said: 

"The signs of the hypocrite are three: when he speaks, he lies, when he makes a promise he breaks it, and when he is entrusted with something he breaks that trust." (al-Bukhaari, Muslim) 

We can’t even lie in a joke!

The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said:

“Woe to the one who talks to make the people laugh and tells lies, woe to him, woe to him.’” 

(at-Tirmidhi & Abu Dawud)

I can go on and on. 

The ahaadeeth are many. 

So we as Muslims can never lie unless under very specific or severe situations,  for example: 

-when life is in danger

- when we want to reconcile among people, 

- during war and 

- when a husband or wife want to please each other.

Umm Kalthoom Radhi Allah anhaa said that the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said: 

"He is not a liar who reconciles between people, conveying good messages and saying good things." 

She said: 

“I did not hear him grant any concession concerning anything that the people say of lies except in three cases: reconciling between people, war, and what a man says to his wife, or a woman says to her husband.”

 (Muslim)

So unless it’s your spouse, or it’s to save someone’s life or during war strategy etc., you cannot lie. 

If someone asks you a sensitive question that will make them sad or hurt them if you tell them the truth, then try and use words that double entendres. 

Double entendres is when you mean something other than the apparent meaning of the words or using phrases that are true but hide the reality. 

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen said: 

“Double entendre refers to when a person means something other than the apparent meaning of the words. 

It is permissible subject to two conditions:  

1. that the word may be interpreted in that fashion

2. that there be no wrongdoing involved.”

So if someone asks you “Did you like my food?” You can say “Alhamdulillaah! Jazaak Allaah Khair sister I really appreciate it. You must have worked so hard to cook it. May Allaah reward you.”

And that would satisfy them. 

And if someone says “Am I pretty?” 

You can say lovingly “You know the most beautiful thing I like about you is your smile” or “your eyes” or “you’re so kind hearted” or whatever it is that you think is the best thing about them. 

And that will make them happy. 

So be smart and wise and use words that are true yet can be taken in a good way and not hurt them. 

And Allaah knows best

671. Is Woman’s Prayer Different From Man?

By Asma bint Shameem 

Whenever there’s ‘confusion’ about anything, Allaah tells us what to do. 

He says:

“(And) if you differ in anything amongst yourselves, refer it to Allaah and His Messenger, if you believe in Allaah and in the Last Day. That is better and more suitable for final determination” (al-Nisa’ 4:59)

Referring to Allaah, means looking at the Qur’aan and referring to the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam, means looking at his authentic Sunnah. 

So what’s important and correct is where we have *proof* from the practice of the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam and the Sahaabah. 

So the question is 

“Did the Sahaabiyaat pray different from the way the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam and the men Companions prayed?

When we look at history and the authentic ahaadeeth, there’s *no authentic proof* that the women Companions prayed differently from the men. 

If they had prayed differently we would have had EVIDENCE regarding that. 

Obviously Salaah was the most  important deed in their lives and their whole lives revolved around it. 

Yet there’s *no authentic hadeeth* telling us that the women prayed differently from the men. 

In fact, the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam specifically told us. 

He said:

“Pray as you have seen me praying.” (al-Bukhaari)

He said this to *BOTH men AND women*. 

He did not say “this is for the men only” or “the women should pray differently” etc. 

If there *was* any difference in the prayers, surely the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam would have specifically said so. 

And he Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam also said:

"Women are the twin halves of men" (Ahmad - saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami)

So the women will have the same rulings for everything in our Deen as men except when there is evidence of a specific ruling which applies only to women.

And since there’s no specific instructions of the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam regarding how women are to stand together in the rows, that’s different from the men, then the same rulings as the men applies to them as well. 

So we should also stand shoulder to shoulder and foot to foot. 

And we should also try and straighten the rows when we pray. 

Similarly we should sit the same way, make rukoo and sujood the same way. 

Shaykh al-Albaani said: 

“Everything that we have said above about the way in which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) prayed applies equally to men and women. There is nothing narrated in the Sunnah which implies that women are exempted from any of that. Rather the general meaning of the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), “Pray as you have seen me praying,” include women too.” 

(Sifat Salaat al-Nabi)

Objection

What about the ahaadeeth that say there’s a difference between the prayer of a man and a woman

Answer 

Those who say that there is a difference between the prayer of men and women quote only ahaadeeth that are *WEAK*. 

And as you know, if a hadeeth is weak, that means it’s highly *doubtful* that the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam ever said that, did that or approved of that. 

So why go into doubtful things when we have clear authentic ahaadeeth from Saheeh al-Bukhaari?

Or they might be practicing their own ijtehaad for saying that. 

But there’s no solid proof from the practice or ahaadeeth of the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam  

It’s Logical

Besides, its even *logical* to pray the same way as the men. 

Why?

Those who say women should pray differently from men say that we should pray in a manner that is befitting our ‘hayaa’ and we should *compress* ourselves when making sujood and not to bend our backs too much when making rukoo’ etc. because other ‘men’ might look at us and we’ll be exposing our bodies. 

But why do we need to compress ourselves?

Who will be looking at us when most of our lives we pray in the privacy of our homes?

And even in the masjid, are there any men praying behind us? 

No of course not.

The reason WHY women are supposed to behind the men in congregation IS BECAUSE there will be no chance of anyone ‘looking’ at the women.  

So there’s no ‘need’ for worrying about ‘compressing’ ourselves because of ‘hayaa’ or modesty. 

EXCEPTION 

One concession to the above may be if women are praying in an *open* area where there may be men around and our bodies may be exposed if we make rukoo and sujood like the men. For example if we’re at a park, or airport or even the Haram. 

Sometimes there are no corners or secluded areas where women can pray in such open places. 

In *such* situations if a woman will compress herself while making rukoo and sujood, then the ulama say it’s allowed. 

But that’s a *specific* situation. 

*Generally speaking*, women should be praying exactly the same as the men and there’s no difference in how we pray. 

Minor difference 

There are a few MINOR differences in the prayer of men and women such as:

-Men give adhaan and iqaamah, women don’t, according to some ulama. 

- the male Imaam leads the men by standing ahead of them alone in the front while a female Imaam will stand WITH the other women in the *same* row and *not* ahead of them.  

- a male Imaam may lead men and women while a female Imaam cannot lead men. She can only lead women.

- women have to cover everything except their face while the men don’t have to cover all that. 

- it’s better for women to pray at home while the men are supposed to pray in the masjid 

- when praying in Jama’ah, men pray in *front* of the women. Women cannot pray in front of men. 

- the front rows are better for the men while the back rows are better for women (when there’s no partition in between them)

- Salatul Jumu’ah is fardh for the men and not for the women. 

And some other minor differences. 

And Allaah knows best

670. What Is The Etiquette Of Boy Meeting A Girl Who Is In Hijab?

By Asma Bint Shameem

1. The families of the boy and the girl meet and talk to each other. 

The males can look at the perspective groom and the females can look at the bride, and get to know him or her. 

They also can ask around and get to know the friends of the perspective groom or bride and get an idea of the kind of person he or she is. 

Then when all looks good, the boy can meet the girl in the presence of the girl’s Wali a couple of times or so. 

And they can discuss things in front of the wali without any khulwah. 

They can also see if there’s chemistry/attraction between them. 

If everyone is pleased, the marriage should be arranged soon. 

And should not be delayed unnecessarily. 

A long engagement is discouraged because the two might fall into fitnah. 

So if both parties like each other, there’s no reason why they should not get married. 

2. There’s a difference of opinion among the scholars about 

how much of a woman may be seen if a man wants to look at her for marriage purposes. 

According to Imaam Ahmad, a woman may be seen without hijaab so he can see her hair, face and hands. 

  

But once he’s seen her, she should wear hijaab from him and he cannot see her hair anymore until the Nikaah is done. 

This can easily be achieved by looking at a photograph. 

Jaabir ibn ‘Abd-Allaah said: 

“The Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam 

said: 

“When one of you proposes to a woman, if he can look at that which may encourage him to go ahead and marry her, let him do so.” 

He said: 

I proposed to a girl and I used to hide myself from her until I saw that which encouraged me to marry her, and I went ahead and married her.”

(Abu Dawood-saheeh by al-Albaani)

Muhammad ibn Maslamah radhi Allaahu anhu said: 

“I proposed marriage to a woman, then I hid and waited to see her until I saw her among some date palm trees that belonged to her. 

It was said to him: “Do you do such a thing when you are a companion of the Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam?” 

He said, 

“When Allaah causes a man to propose to a woman, there is nothing wrong with him looking at her.” 

(Ibn Maajah-saheeh by al-Albaani)

Shaikh ibn Baaz said:

“If she uncovers her face, hands and head for him, there is no objection, according to the most correct opinion.Some of the scholars said that it is sufficient for him to see her face and hands, but the most correct opinion is that there is no objection to him seeing her head, face, hands and feet, according to the aforementioned Hadeeth. But it is not permissible for him to do so, while being alone with her; rather, her father, her brother or another must be present with her. 

This is because the Prophet sallallaahu alayhi was salaam said:

‘A man may not be secluded with a woman except with a Mahram.’ Muslim no. 1341 (Fatawa Islamiyyah,207/208)

And shaikh al-Albaani was of the view that one is allowed to see the hair after one has proposed. 

Someone asked him:

“Is it permissible for a man to look at other than the face and hands of the woman he wishes to propose to, such as looking at her hair and her neck?”

The Shaikh said:

“That which is apparent to me, and Allaah knows best, is that this is permissible without a previous agreement. 

He sal-Allaahu `alayhe wa sallam said that which means:

“If anyone’s heart settles on proposing to a woman, then he can look at that which will lead him to marry her”, 

[This is the hadeeth of Jaabir ibn ‘Abdillaah radhi Allaahu anhu  who said: 

The Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam 

said:

“If any of you has proposed to a woman, and if he is able to look at that which will lead him to marry her, then he should do so”

As regards a previous agreement, then it is not permissible to look at more than the face and hands.

(Fataawa Muhimmah li-Nisaa. al-Ummah – Page 138)

And Allaah knows best

669. What Are The Names That Only Belong To Allah Alone?

By Asma Bint Shameem

The names of Allaah are of two kinds.

1. Names that only belong to Allaah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala Alone and no one can be given these names.  

For example Allaah, al-Rabb, al-Rahmaan, al-Ahad, al-Samad, al-Mutakabbir, etc. 

There’s consensus of the scholars that we can’t name a child these names except by adding the word  ‘Abd’ in front of it. 

(Abd means ‘slave of..’)

So Abd-Allaah, AbdurRabb, AbdurRahmaan, AbdulAhad, etc is permissible. 

2. Names that don’t apply to Allaah Alone. 

These names can be used for humans. 

For example Samee’, Baseer, Ali, Hakeem, Raheem etc. 

Allaah called the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam ‘Raheem’ and ‘Ra’oof’ in Surah at-Taubah. 

He said:

‎لَقَدْ جَاءَكُمْ رَسُولٌ مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ عَزِيزٌ عَلَيْهِ مَا عَنِتُّمْ حَرِيصٌ عَلَيْكُم بِالْمُؤْمِنِينَ رَءُوفٌ رَّحِيمٌ

“Verily, there has come unto you a Messenger (Muhammad) from amongst yourselves. It grieves him that you should receive any injury or difficulty. He (Muhammad) is anxious over you (to be rightly guided, to repent to Allah, and beg Him to pardon and forgive your sins, in order that you may enter Paradise and be saved from the punishment of the Hell-fire); for the believers (he is) full of pity, kind, and merciful.” (Surah at-Taubah: 129)

What is forbidden is only those names that apply to Allaah Alone, such as al-Rahmaan, al-Ahad, al-Khaaliq, etc. 

Ibn al-Qayyim said: 

“Names which it is forbidden to give to people include the names of the Lord, may He be blessed and exalted, so it is not permissible to call people by names such as al-Ahad (the Unique), al-Samad (the Self-Sufficient Master, Whom all creatures need, He neither eats nor drinks), al-Khaaliq (the Creator) or al-Razzaaq (the Provider), or any of the other names that apply only to the Lord, may He be blessed and exalted. And it is not permissible to call kings al-Qaahir (the Subduer) or al-Zaahir (the Most High or the Manifest), or to call them al-Jabbaar (the Compeller), al-Mutakabbir (the Majestic), al-Awwal (the First), al-Aakhir (the Last), al-Baatin (the Most Near or the Hidden), or ‘Allaam al-Ghuyoob (Knower of the unseen).”

[Tuhfat al-Mawdood (p. 125)]

So it’s best not to name the child Ahad or Khaaliq or Rahmaan or Qudoos but you can add ‘Abd’ in front of it to make it Abdul Ahad, or Abdul Khaaliq or AbdurRahmaan or Abdul Qudoos etc. 

And Allaah knows best.

668. Yaum Al-Mazeed

By Asma bint Shameem 

Did you know that Friday is also called “Yaum al-Mazeed” or “The Day of More”?

And why is that?

Well, there’s a very special reason for that. 

It’s called Yaum al-Mazeed because not only will the believers enter Jannah and that itself is a humongous, incomparable blessing, but the believers will ALSO be able to see their Rabb, their Master, their Creator, Allaah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala on Fridays!

Part of the belief of Ahl as-Sunnah wa’l-Jamaa‘ah is that the believers will see Allaah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala on the Day of Judgment and in Jannah. 

Allaah says:

“Some faces that Day shall be Nadirah (shining and radiant).

Looking at their Lord (Allaah).” [al-Qiyaamah :22-23].

And Allaah says:

لَهُم مَّا يَشَاءُونَ فِيهَا وَلَدَيْنَا مَزِيد

“There (in Jannah) they will have all that they desire, and We have “MAZEED” (“MORE”  for them, i.e. a glance at the All-Mighty, All-Majestic)” [Qaaf 50:35]).’ 

Ali and Anas ibn Maalik radhi Allaahu anhumaa said: “What is meant by “more” here is looking upon the Face of Allaah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala.”

The people of Jannah will have a gathering with their Lord every Friday on which they will have the blessing of gazing upon His noble Countenance. 

This is the “MAZEED” on that Day.

Allaah says:

“For those who have done good is the best reward and “EVEN MORE” (i.e. having the honor of glancing at the Countenance of Allaah)”[Yoonus 10:26]

The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam explained the above Aayah and said::

“When the people of Paradise enter Paradise, Allaah will say, ‘Do you want anything more?’ They will say, ‘Have You not brightened our faces, admitted us to Paradise and saved us from Hell?’ Then the veil will be lifted and they will not have seen anything more dear to them than looking upon their Lord, may He be glorified and exalted. This is what is meant by ‘EVEN MORE.’” Then he recited the Aayah from Surah Yunus “ (Saheeh Muslim 266)

The Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam also said:

“Jibreel came to me with something like a white mirror in his hand, on which there was a black spot. 

I said: 

‘What is this, O Jibreel?’ 

He said: 

‘This is Jumu‘ah (Friday); it is the master of days and we call it Yawm al-Mazeed (“the day of more”) 

I said: 

‘O Jibreel, what does “more” mean?’ 

He said: 

‘That is because your Lord has allocated a valley in Paradise that is more fragrant than white musk. When Friday comes, among the days in the Hereafter, the Lord, Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala, will descend from His Throne (‘Arsh) to His Kursiy, and the Kursiy will be surrounded with seats of light on which the Prophets will sit. 

These seats will be surrounded with footstools of gold on which the martyrs will sit. 

The people of the chambers will come down from the chambers and sit on sand hills of musk, and those who sit on the sand hills will not think that those who sit on the footstools and seats are any better off than them. 

Then the Owner of Majesty and Honor  will appear and say: 

‘Ask of Me.’ 

They will say: 

‘We ask for Your good pleasure, O Lord.’ 

He will say: 

‘It is because I am pleased with you that you are in My Paradise, and you are honored.’ 

Then He will say (again): 

‘Ask of Me.’ 

They will say all together: 

‘We ask for Your good pleasure.’ 

He will ask them to testify that He is pleased with them. 

Then He will say (once more): 

‘Ask of Me,’ and they will ask of Him until each one of them is finished. 

Then He will grant them that which no eye has seen, no ear has heard, and it has not crossed the mind of any human.” 

(At-Tabaraani in al-Mu‘jam al-Kabeer 6717)

And in another narration, the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam added:

“… there is nothing that they are more eager for than Friday; the more they gaze upon their Lord, the more they will increase in honor.” 

(Ibn Abi’d-Dunya in Sifat al-Jannah 88; hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh at-Targheeb, 3761)

Amazing, Subhaan Allaah!

Imagine the joy and blessing of being able to see Allaah, your Rabb!

The One you never saw...Yet you believed!

The One you made duaa to, the One you cried to and complained and poured your heart to.

The One you worshipped all these years, believing in Him without seeing Him. 

The One Who knows each and every thing about you, your each secret, your every sin...

The One you hope will forgive you and grant you mercy....

And now on Fridays in Jannah, you get to see Him!

Allaahu Akbar!

There will be nothing more dear to you and nothing more honorable than the best reward” in Jannah, and “EVEN MORE”....

to gaze upon the Holy Countenance of the Lord of the heavens and the earth.

Isn’t this the greatest blessing that the Most Merciful will bestow upon you?

This is “Yaum al-Mazeed”

The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam  said: 

“In Paradise there is a market to which they will come every Friday. 

Then the north wind will blow and will blow on their faces and garments, and increase them in beauty. Then they will return to their families having increased in beauty and their families will say to them: 

By Allaah, you have increased in beauty, and they will say: 

By Allaah, you too have increased in beauty.” (Muslim 2833) 

Al-Hasan said: 

“They will look at their Lord and their faces will become radiant with His Light.” 

Jareer ibn ‘Abd-Allaah radhi Allaahu anhu said

“We were sitting with the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam looking at the moon on the night of the fourteenth (of the month). 

He said, 

‘You will see your Lord with your own eyes just as you are looking at this (moon), without any doubt that you are seeing Him.’” 

(al-Bukhaari 6883; Saheeh Muslim 1002)

Abdullah ibn Mas‘ood radhi Allaahu anhu said: 

“Hasten to Jumu‘ah, for verily Allaah will appear to the people of Jannah every Friday when they gather at a sand hill of camphor, and their closeness to Him will be commensurate with the degree to which they hastened to Jumu‘ah in this world.” 

Ibn Taimiyyah said: 

“Seeing Allaah in the Hereafter in general is connected to the *congregational prayers*. 

If it was prescribed for people in this world to gather to remember Allaah, converse with Him, and find joy in meeting Him in prayer every Friday, then in the Hereafter they will be allocated a meeting every Friday to converse with Him, see Him and find joy in meeting Him. 

If the Sunnah stated that the women should be enjoined to go out on ‘Eid, even those who remained in seclusion and those who were menstruating, and at the time of the Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam most of the women went out on the Eid, their Eid in the Hereafter will include seeing Him, commensurate with their Eid in this world.”(Majmoo‘ al-Fataawa, 6/420)

And Ibn al-Qayyim:said:

“Friday is the day when the people of Jannah will receive the ever-increasing reward. It is the day when they will see Allaah, the Exalted. Those who were the earliest to go to the masjid on Friday will be the first to receive this honor. Thus, the nearest to Allaah were those nearest to the Imaam on Friday. The residents of Jannah are eager for Friday, the day of “More”, due to the honor they will receive on that day.” 

(Zaad Al-Ma’ad 1/59-65)

So strive HARD for that “Day of Mazeed”.

Hasten to the prayer every Friday, sit close to the Imaam and be eager to listen to him. 

May Allaah make us among those who witness Yaum al-Mazeed. 

And Allaah knows best