Assalaamu Alaykum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh

Friday, May 8, 2020

64. Your Son’s Wife Is Not His Mother

There are two kinds of women who can change a man inside out, and they are a mother and a wife. Both hold a superior level of importance in his life and deserve equal love, care and respect for the responsibilities they fulfill.

However it has been noted in the sub-continent, how some people fail and refuse to understand that there is a very big difference in ...duties that both females are supposed to fulfill. 

Often people expect the wife to do things the mothers were supposed to. They both have different obligations and everything should not be dumped on the wife.

You may have heard people say, “Get him married off and then he will understand what his responsibilities are”, or “Don’t worry, after he gets married, things will be better. His wife will make him a man.”

My question is: Why? Why put an innocent girl through something she doesn’t deserve? It is not the wife’s duty to fix the man she is marrying. She should marry a man who has been brought up well, who can financially sustain her and who can give her the love and respect she deserves.

A mother is supposed to train her children preparing them for the hardships they will have to face in life, teach them manners, educate them well, make them understand the difference between right and wrong, love and care for them and cater to their needs when they are young and teach them to be good human beings.

A wife on the other hand is supposed to look after her husband and cater to his needs emotionally and physically. She is to take care of him and her family and multi-task in the situations she feels necessary. 

What she is not supposed to be doing is cleaning up her mother in law’s mess. 

She is not supposed to be teaching her husband basic manners, how to be responsible or how to be a good person because his own mother failed to do so.

Mothers, please fulfill your duties as a mom and do not dump them on your son’s wife. 

There are some responsibilities you have to fulfill and there are some she has to but please don’t burden her with everything and complicate her married life.

Do you agree? 

Why do mothers expect their daughter-in-laws to fulfill the duties that they should have done themselves? 

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