547. Asking Others To Make Duaa For You

By Asma bint Shameem 

“Please make duaa for me” 

“Remember me in your prayers” 

“Duaa ki darkhaast (Request for duaas)”

It seems that this phrase has become EXTREMELY common, whether people know each other or not. 

Every single time you meet them or talk to them on the phone, they say “Remember me in your duaas” as they part. 

Subhaan Allaah even if they’re a complete stranger and you “happen” to talk to them for a BRIEF second

and you’ll probably will never see them in your life ever again, they still ask you to remember them and make duaa for them. 

But is this practice really from the Sunnah?

Did the Sahaabah ask each other to make duaa for them?

Let’s see what our Deen says about that. 

The scholars say that it’s not recommended to keep asking people to make duaa for you, irrespective of whether you know them or not. 

A Muslim is honorable. 

He has RESPECT. 

And it’s BELOW the dignity of a Muslim to ask others for ANYTHING. 

He does not “NEED” ANY THING from ANY ONE. 

He depends on NO ONE BUT Allaah. 

Why do we need to ask anyone to make duaa for us anyway?

Isn’t Allaah ENOUGH for us?

Isn’t He close to us and accessible to us?

Didn’t He say:

وَقَالَ رَبُّكُمُ ادْعُونِي أَسْتَجِبْ لَكُمْ

“And your Rabb said: ‘Invoke Me, [i.e. believe and ask and supplicate to me] I will respond to you (your invocation)…” [Ghafir, 60]

Ibn Abbas radhi Allaahu anhu 

said that the Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam said:

“Be NEEDLESS of people, even (from asking) for a miswak.”

[Al-Mu’jam al-Kabeer, saheeh by al-Albaani ]

 And A’ishah  radhi Allaahu anhaa said:

“Ask Allaah for everything, even the shasa’ [lace (of a shoe) or a reign of an animal] for verily if Allaah (does not grant it), it will not be facilitated.”

[Musnad Abi Ya’la, hasan by al-Haythami]

So it’s good to ask NO ONE BUT Allaah. 

And although it’s *”allowed”* to ask a Muslim to make duaa for you, it’s from the DISLIKED acts. 

The Sahaabah NEVER asked each other to make duaa for them on a regular basis. 

 In surah al-Naml, Allaah describes Himself by saying:

أَمَّن يُجِيبُ الْمُضْطَرَّ إِذَا دَعَاهُ وَيَكْشِفُ السُّوءَ

“He Who responds to one in distress when he calls Him, and Who removes harm...” (Surah an-Naml :62)

In his commentary on this ayah, Imaam al-Qurtubi said:

A man came to Maalik ibn Dinar and said, “I ask you, by Allah, to supplicate on my behalf, for I am truly in distress.”

So Maalik ibn Dinar responded, “If that is the case, then you should ask Him yourself for He is the One who responds to one in distress when he calls Him.”

[Tafsir al-Qurtubi 13/207]

Abu Sa‘eed al-Khudri narrated that some people from among the Ansaar asked the Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam and he gave them, then they asked him and he gave them, then they asked him and he gave them, until what he had was exhausted. 

He said: 

“Whatever I have of good I will never withhold from you, but *whoever refrains from asking (of people), Allaah will make him content, whoever seeks to be independent of means, Allaah will make him independent, and whoever strives to be patient Allah will bestow patience upon him, and no one is ever given anything better and more abundant than patience.”* (al-Bukhaari, Muslim) 

al-Qurtubi said: 

“whoever refrains from asking (of people), Allaah will make him CONTENT” that is, He will reward him for his refraining from asking by preserving his dignity and meeting his needs. 

“whoever refrains from asking” that is, whoever tries to force himself to refrain from asking of others. 

 or he asks Allaah to help him to refrain from asking (of people), 

“Allaah will make him content” that is, He will help him to refrain, which is protecting him from falling into that which is prohibited.

 In other words, he will be content with the least provision and will refrain from asking of others; it will be easy for him to become content, and that is a treasure that will never fade.”

 Ibn at-Teen said: 

“What is meant by the words “Allaah will make him content” is that either Allaah will grant him sufficient wealth so that he will have no need to ask of others, or He will bless him with contentment.”

Hakeem ibn Hizaam said:

 I heard the Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam say: 

“Whoever seeks to be independent of means, Allaah will make him INDEPENDENT, and *whoever refrains from asking (of people), Allaah will make him CONTENT.*” 

I said: 

(Should we not ask) even of you, O Messenger of Allaah?

He said: *“(Not) even from me.”* 

I said: Hakeem said:  I shall never let my hand be beneath the hand of another man of the Arabs.” (Ahmad (15578) with a saheeh isnaad)

Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar  said: 

“This hadith encourages us to strive to be independent of people and refrain from asking them, by being patient, putting our trust in Allaah and waiting for what Allaah grants as provision. 

Patience is the best thing that a person may be given, because the reward for it is unlimited.” [al-Fath(11/304)]

An-Nawawi said: 

“In this hadith we are encouraged to refrain from asking of people and to be content with what is available, so as to preserve one’s dignity, even if what is available is little.” [Sharh Muslim(7/126)]

Malik al-Ashja'i reported:

"We, nine, eight or seven men, were in the company of the Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam 

He said: 

“Why don't you pledge allegiance to the Messenger of Allaah?” although we had recently pledged allegiance.

So we said: 

“Messenger of Allaah, we have already pledged allegiance to you.”

He again said:

“Why don't you pledge allegiance to the Messenger of Allaah?”

We said: 

“Messenger of Allaah, we have already pledged allegiance to you.”

He again said: 

“Why don't you pledge allegiance to the Messenger of Allaah?”

We stretched our hands and said: 

“Messenger of Allah. we have already pledged allegiance to you. Now tell (on what things) should we pledge allegiance to you.”

He said: 

“(You must pledge allegiance) that you would worship Allaah only and would not associate with Him anything, (and observe) five prayers, and obey, (and he said one thing in an undertone), that you would not ask people of anything.”

(And as a consequence of that) I saw that some of these people did not ask anyone to pick up the whip for them if it fell down." (Muslim) 

Once Taawus, one of the scholars of the taabi’een, visited a sick person, who asked him: 

“O Taawus, please make dua for me“. 

Taawus replied: “Pray for your OWN self, for He is the One that responds to the one in distress“.

Shaikh Ibn Uthaymeen said about asking others to make duaa for you:

“This is permissible, but I do not recommend it. 

I think that each person should ask Allaah by himself, without appointing any intermediary between him and Allaah. 

That brings a greater hope and is nearer to fear of Allaah.”

[Majmoo’ Fataawa wa Rasaa’il Ibn ‘Uthaymeen(2/277)]

QUESTION

BUT we all go through problems. 

Can’t we ask our loved ones to make duaa for us?

That’s perfectly ok for people going through stress or problems to ask their loved ones to make duaa for them. 

I’m talking about when people just have the “habit” of asking others to make duaa. 

 It’s like a catchphrase.  

They say it without thinking.

And like I said, asking others for duaa is *“allowed”*

It’s NOT prohibited 

It’s just a HIGHER level of Taqwa not to ask anyone. 

It’s a VERY NOBLE deed. 

That’s why the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam asked a *SPECIAL group* *of Sahaabah* for this promise. 

That’s why NOBLES like Abu Bakr as-Siddiq is one of those who NEVER asked ANYONE for even the LITTLEST things; even if his whip fell down, he would not ask someone standing to pick it up for him. 

Rather he would get down from his mount and pick it up himself. 

Subhaan Allaah!

Such honor. 

Such dignity. 

This level of complete tawakkul on Allaah is achieved only by a select few. 

*It’s something we all should AIM for, even if we can’t achieve it.* 

That’s why the people who will be entered into Jannah WITHOUT ACCOUNT are those who don’t ask for  ruqyah even though they’re sick and NEED it. 

The Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said:

‘(It was said to him) 

“This is your ummah, and of these, seventy thousand will enter Paradise without being brought to account.

They are the ones who *DO NOT ASK for ruqyah*, do not believe in bad omens and do not use branding; *they put their TRUST in their Lord*…”

(al-Bukhaari) 

Subhaan Allaah!

Entering Jannah without account!

So what’s the characteristic that elevated their ranks to such an honor?!

Their TAWAKKUL In Allaah!

“They DO NOT ASK for ruqyah”

“They put their trust in their Lord”

In other words, they’re *sick*. 

They *need* the ruqyah. 

But instead of asking PEOPLE, *they ASK ALLAAH.*

*It’s a HIGHER level of Taqwa.* 

*A GREATER level of Imaan.* 

Remember this golden rule:

You should not “make” people supplicate for you. 

Rather, you should *“EARN”* those duaas without even the need to ask anyone, through your good manners and deeds.

May Allaah enable us to depend on NO ONE but HIM. 

And ask NO ONE BUT HIM. 

Ameen 

And Allaah knows best